12- His Supplication in Confession

12 - His Supplication in Confession and in Seeking Repentance toward God O God, three traits have prevented me from asking Thee and one trait has urged me on: I am prevented by a command Thou hast commanded in which I have been slow, a prohibition Thou hast prohibited toward which I have hurried, and a favour through which Thou hast favoured for which I have not given sufficient thanks. I am urged to ask thee by Thy gratuitous bounty upon him who turns his face toward Thee and comes to Thee with a good opinion, since all Thy beneficence is gratuitous bounty and every one of Thy favours a new beginning! So here I am, my God, standing at the gate of Thy might, the standing of the lowly, the surrendered, asking Thee in my shame, the asking of the destitute, the pitiful, admitting to Thee that at the time of Thy beneficence I surrendered not save through abstaining from disobedience toward Thee and in none of my states was I ever without Thy Kindness. Will it profit me, my God, to admit to Thee the evil of what I have earned? Will it save me from Thee to confess the ugliness of what I have done? Or wilt Thou impose upon me in this my station Thy displeasure? Will Thy hate hold fast to me in the time of my supplication? Glory be to Thee! I do not despair of Thee, for Thou hast opened the door of repentance toward Thyself. Rather, I say, the words of a lowly servant, having wronged himself and made light of his Lord's inviolability, and whose sins are dreadful, great, whose days have parted, fled, until, when he sees the term of his works expired and the limit of his lifetime reached and knows with certainty that he has no escape from Thee, no place to flee from Thee, he turns his face toward Thee in repeated turning, makes his repentance toward Thee sincere, stands before Thee with a pure and purified heart, then supplicates Thee with a feeble, quiet voice. He is bowed before Thee, bent, his head lowered, thrown down, his legs shaking in fear, his tears flooding his cheeks. He supplicates Thee : O Most Merciful of the merciful! O Most Merciful of those toward whom seekers of mercy keep on turning! O Tenderest of those around whom run seekers of forgiveness! O He whose pardon is greater than His vengeance! O He whose good pleasure is more abundant than His anger! O He who seeks His creatures' praise with excellent forbearance! O He who has accustomed His servants to the acceptance of their repeated turning! O He who seeks to heal their corruption through repentance! O He who is pleased with the easy of their acts! O He who recompenses with the much their little! O He who has made himself accountable to them to respond to supplication! O He who pledged Himself by His gratuitous bounty to give them excellent repayment! I am not the most disobedient of those who have disobeyed Thee and whom Thou hast forgiven, nor am I the most blameworthy to offer excuses which Thou hast accepted, nor am I the most wrongdoing of those who have repented to Thee, and to whom Thou hast returned I repent to Thee in this my station, the repentance of one remorseful over what preceded from him hastily, apprehensive of what has gathered around him, pure in shame for that into which he has fallen, knowing that pardoning great sins is nothing great for Thee. overlooking enormous misdeeds is not difficult for Thee, putting up with indecent crimes does not trouble Thee, and the most beloved of Thy servants to Thee is he who refrains from arrogance before Thee, pulls aside from persistence, and holds fast to praying forgiveness! I am clear before Thee of arrogance, I seek refuge in Thee from persistence, I pray forgiveness from Thee for shortcomings, I seek help from Thee in incapacity! O God, bless Muhammad and his Household, dispence with what is incumbent upon me toward Thee, release me from what I merit from Thee, and grant me sanctuary from what the evildoers fear! For Thou art full of pardon, the hoped-for source of forgiveness, well known for Thy forbearance. My need has no object but Thee, my sin no forgiver other than Thee - could that be possible? I have no fear for myself except from Thee; Thou art 'worthy of reverential fear, and worthy to forgive'! Bless Muhammad and his Household, grant my need, answer my request favourably, and give me security from fear for myself! 'Thou art powerful over everything', and that is easy for Thee. Amen, Lord of the worlds!